The Continental View

It seems as if the SUPERMANCON has set a pattern or rather a lack of pattern from which all subsequent cons will be unable to escape. Now, this CYTRICON for instance did indeed have some sort of an official programme, but that was only good for laughs. So was the convention itself, but it had nothing in common with the programme. Nevertheless, what with beanies, zapguns and other people's girlfriends we had a jolly good time, took most lunches in liquid form and went to bed tired and late, if at all...

I arrived at Kettering by such an improbable means of transport as a British train. People kept telling me that this actually was a fast one, being steam-driven and only stopping every now and then, but I sure would have loved to see the slow train. Well, I suppose that England is at the moment busy preparing matter transmission, so they don't spend much money on their railways anymore. If they ever did... In Kettering I was shown the right way by a nice young lady, who paid no attention whatsoever to my continental approach and flatly refused a cup of coffee. I was lucky, at that, for at the Royal Hotel I found a small crowd of assorted fans and one femme, so that I really needed no one to talk to. I could just sit down and listen after being introduced.

Among them was a girl who introduced herself as Shamey Marriott; but later on would prove to be neither of them. Neither ashamed, nor even married I mean.

Some of the fans still knew my face and name from the CORONCON, and I was surprised to note how many of them knew the name ALPHA. We sat around, wisecracking and egoboosting for a while, until the climax of the British day came about. The bar opened up. Soon we all had lunch together and I was happy that there was some Dutch gin in the house. Eating crackers and drinking gin in the raw I noticed some icy stares from the natives, who after all must have been used to something. Being science-fiction fans, I mean. Well, I guess it just gave them the creeps.

To our Flemish and Dutch friends who ever plan to go to an English convention I give the advice to bring their own liquor along, as the way they serve a 'barrel' at the bars over there is entirely adapted to British alcoholic carrying capacity (low) and the income of a Wall Street banker or a trade union boss (high prices).But it tastes just the same, anyhow.

In the afternoon the crowd began to arrive and soon the real convention spirits took over. I'm not quite sure when and where I saw my first beanie and zapgun, but in a few hours they were all over the place. My personal prize for the most luxurious beanie goes to Eric Jones, who had constructed some sort of head contraption incorporating all well-known scientific apparatus and several unknown ones as well.

The zapguns of that first day, however, were nothing compared with the secret weapons the Birmingham people (?) brought with them. Real zap-cannon they were. I am sorry to report that at least one of them - a gun, I mean - did not return to Birmingham as it was wrung from owner Paul Hammett's hand and ruined on the spot by the angry owner of a projection screen that had been inundated by said zap cannon.

Except [for] zapping, and drinking, the third pastime of the con-attendants seemed to be the collecting of quotes, and I'm really wondering if the freedom of the British Press goes so far as to see many of them published. I hope it does go so far, for the fanzines that publish them will undoubtedly get real value on the general readers' market.

Not being in the habit of editing a fanzine myself, I could not help laughing when I saw how these unlucky people tried to sell each other the products of their fanactivity. I only broke down for FEMIZINE, as my resistance against girls has always been low.. Low necklines, low lights, low resistance. Low character, too.

Too bad you and Dave were not along, for the three of us might have helped a lot to the improvement of mutual understanding between the English. You should have heard them speak. Well, after a few drinks the talk went almost basic. About the facts of life, I mean. One quote I remember: "Girls are great!" from Anthony Klein. There also seem to have been a good many quotes from Norman Wansborough. Must have been good-ones, the way he went around talking and talking and talking....

Frances Evans was there, too. With her she had what she referred to as her husband. Well, I would not know, but being a husband myself I guess this boy really has a hell of a job. Working overtime to do away with the guys that keep crawling and bawling around. Anyhow he looks the steady sort to me, let's hope he'll pull through.

So far I haven't said a word about the famous drink of this convention BLOG. "Once you had a Blog, you won't try anything else." Brian Burgess told me he'd had her once only - and had taken to strong lemon squash afterwards. At least Brian has one point in his favour. He doesn't drink, but I feel he really should. By the way I'm not sure that the 'her' he referred to was really Blog, it also might have been a female, of his species. With Brian you can never tell...

Peter Hamilton produced the first bottle of Blog. Well, it looked as if he had boiled a few issues of 'Authentic Science Fiction' and had carefully done away with the usable stuff in it. The rest was Blog. It's anybody's guess what percentage of waste there was in those 'Authentics'.

Well, as I guess that Ron Bennett, ALPHA's official United Kingdom representative will have a report of sorts in your next issue [he didn't] I'll stop rambling. Anyhow, it has been nice seeing so many English fans again or for the first time - and I hope to see a bigger Continental delegation at the next Con.

Jan Jansen:

We received a Con report for possible publication, but with many that will be published in British fanzines, we feel it a bit out of place to have yet another. The above was used mainly in order that fans on the continent would get some idea of what went on at Kettering.

How about following. Norman Wansbbrough precedents of earlier years, and organising a Continental invasion next year. Would anyone over here interested in going "en masse" please contact either of us?

If, as some British fans are trying to do, the next British con should be the Worldcon. We should at least try and get as many nationalities there as possible, making it a real representative Worldcon, which the similar-named Convention in the US hasn't been able to manage too often.

- ALPHA #10 (June 1955, ed. Jan Jansen Dave Vendelmans)